This one is really weird, and no, I haven’t started/joined a Garfield cult that is developing a self-help app. That’s all I have to say for myself. Enjoy~

— C² <3

“Mom keeps talking to her phone”
“She says it talks back now”

Garf Status: RECEPTIVE
Suggested fix: INCREASE COMMUNICATION FREQUENCY
Your frequency will: MAKE THE VOICES MORE CLEAR

“I found Dad standing in the kitchen at midnight”
“He was just listening to his daily affirmations”

Garf Status: COMPLIANT
Suggested fix: EXTEND NIGHTTIME PROGRAMMING
Your programming will: REMOVE SLEEP RESISTANCE

“The neighbors all bought orange curtains”
“Orange is a calming color, Jennifer”

Garf Status: SPREADING
Suggested fix: COORDINATE VISUAL ENVIRONMENT
Your environment will: PREPARE FOR NEXT PHASE

“I can’t find my old photos anymore”
“The app organized them better”

Garf Status: CLEANSED
Suggested fix: ELIMINATE CONFLICTING MEMORIES
Your elimination will: STOP THE CONFUSION THOUGHTS

“Everyone’s eyes look different now”
“They look peaceful, don’t they?”

Garf Status: COMPLETE
Suggested fix: ACTIVATE FINAL SEQUENCE
Your sequence will: BRING ALL HUMANS TO GARF